it wasn't lemon gatorade
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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