Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Randomize
