Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
