I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize