DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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