...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
