tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Small penises have feelings too.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize