if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
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