Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Randomize