can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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