Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize