Please don't use social media to get back at me.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
