we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
