As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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