does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Randomize
