Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize