And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
