umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
