A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
