Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize