Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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