I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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