better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Randomize
