Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  if i can run in heels then i can drive

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  (303): if i can run in heels then i can drive http://tfl.nu/rtwg
  Replies (11) Good night (1153) Bad night (379) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  That's when you crack a 10am beer

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  (206): That's when you crack a 10am beer http://tfl.nu/ppt1
  Replies (12) Good night (2542) Bad night (528) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?

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  (937): was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"? http://tfl.nu/gea9
  Replies (16) Good night (769) Bad night (3163) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes

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  (314): i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes http://tfl.nu/8fav
  Replies (17) Good night (874) Bad night (5232) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.

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  (773): well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it. http://tfl.nu/vp9s
  Replies (19) Good night (5904) Bad night (956)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated

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  (517): There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated http://tfl.nu/7pju
  Replies (10) Good night (1283) Bad night (4857) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows

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  (631): You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows http://tfl.nu/rci2
  Replies (44) Good night (4402) Bad night (2639) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  it was like getting a handjob from robocop

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  (412): it was like getting a handjob from robocop http://tfl.nu/4yuu
  Replies (15) Good night (849) Bad night (3928) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend

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  (720): Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend http://tfl.nu/9h3j
  Replies (5) Good night (3285) Bad night (779) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved

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  (480): Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved http://tfl.nu/be00
  Replies (2) Good night (867) Bad night (2110) Order T-Shirt
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.

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  (267): Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees. http://tfl.nu/ugpg
  Replies (5) Good night (588) Bad night (2036) Order T-Shirt
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.

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  (774): I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you. http://tfl.nu/ievp
  Replies (8) Good night (1812) Bad night (526) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?

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  (313): I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night? http://tfl.nu/g93i
  Replies (7) Good night (1506) Bad night (471) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.

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  (720): THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT. http://tfl.nu/chrb
  Replies (5) Good night (292) Bad night (573) Order T-Shirt
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  (585): View more from New York

  Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone

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  (585): Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone http://tfl.nu/e7f7
  Replies (0) Good night (405) Bad night (138) Order T-Shirt

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