I got chris browned last night
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
