...so i touched it.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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