do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
