I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Randomize