She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Randomize
