I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize