This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
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This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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