Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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