1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
