Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Randomize
