I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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