Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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