Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
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I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
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the gays at disneyland are vicious
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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