i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I wear drunk well.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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