Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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