Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
