Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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