oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
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