I smell stomach acid.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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