just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
