my mouth tastes like poor choices
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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