Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Randomize
