Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
