Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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