So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
