I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize