I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
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